Swordking (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} swordking) wrote,@ 2006-05-18 22:00:00 |
|
A heart for two?
This past week and a half or so has been very interesting. I began with talking to a friend I hadn't talked to in a while and now I'm ending up going to the prom with her. Here's how it all started: My closest friend, Laura, found that her boyfriend was cheating on her for nearly three months. I had no clue of this at all and only heard about it until one day when I finally talked to her when I was leaving school one day and she called me. She told me about it and I felt horrible. She was doing poorly in school, she couldn't sleep, and she was having the same thoughts I had when I was depressed... It made me sick to hear her cry. I was crying a little bit myself just hearing her story. I wanted to help her get through her depression and school work. She had helped me before with my depression. I mean, she practically saved my life. I HAD to repay her somehow, even though there isn't anything I could do to repay her for keeping me alive. I had to do something.
The next day I went to her house to help her on the senior project report. Apparently she missed so much school that she didn't turn this in on time and had to get an extension on the due date. She was short a little over a full page and I put my sentence enhancing skills to work. Needless to say, I got just enough for her to finish the report herself. But it was past 11:00 PM and I felt that it was selfish of me to just let her finish it when all I had to do was just type up the rest of what she already had. Speaking of which, if it wasn't for her other ex-boyfriend, Chris, who I just happen to be delightfully acquainted with (him = geek = yay), I wouldn't have been able to do a thing to help her. Aside from also having to put in a few quotes from her research sources, I believe that I should have done more. I was playing Flash Flash Revolution for Jebus's sake! But working over three hours on something like this had a negative effect on me. I was practically getting dizzy just sitting down in front of the computer. She still didn't get it done the next day and was given one more day to complete it due to a very good-hearted teacher who had talked to the English teacher Laura was doing the project for.
I think it was the next day that she invited me to the prom. It could've been the first day I talked to her, but I can't remember. She already had tickets that she intended to bring her back-stabbing ex along with. I wanted to ask Candra if she was going to the prom, and then later hoping to ask her to go to the prom with me, but I wasn't able to contact her before the school stopped selling tickets. I wasn't so sure on going, mainly because it would feel weird if Candra was going and she saw me with someone else. Also, I would see HER with someone else. Another thing was going through the trouble of getting a tuxedo, something of which I hadn't worn EVER. A few days later, I agreed to take her and that's when the fun began (Insert sarcasm here). Since the past week I got a tux, went dress shopping with her (My advice for guys: don't EVER go shopping with a woman for ANYTHING.), got a bouquet for her, and changed the color of the vest for my tux so that it would match her dress. I had spent a great deal of time with her and I enjoyed it a lot. We get along greatly and have such a fun time together when we hang out. But I think that's where the trouble began.
I spent a few late nights at Laura's house, just hanging out with her. One night after we finished dress shopping, we were up in her room just talking and having the leftover pizza we had at the mall. She got around to talking about her ex and she started to cry. I wanted to say something but I couldn't. She kept talking as I just sat there in silence trying to figure out what to do. Then something snuck up on me, kinda like a sniper bullet in the SOCOM game series. I was starting to develop stronger feelings for Laura. It's so wrong in so many ways. It was starting to cloud my thoughts so that I wasn't able to talk for a good while. I don't know why I was having these thoughts. She's just a really good friend of mine, nothing more. She just recently was dumped by her ex and I don't think that she is in any condition to be going out with someone else so soon. She even still has feelings for the guy that cheated on her. Most importantly, for me at least, it means that I would be kinda cheating on Candra. I proclaimed my love for her. I didn't care if she was going out with someone else, but now I don't think I can just keep going after her. If I show my feelings for Laura, it would mean that all the poetry and that Valentine's card I gave to Candra would be worthless. Tomorrow's the day before the prom, and I just don't know what to do.
This past week and a half or so has been very interesting. I began with talking to a friend I hadn't talked to in a while and now I'm ending up going to the prom with her. Here's how it all started: My closest friend, Laura, found that her boyfriend was cheating on her for nearly three months. I had no clue of this at all and only heard about it until one day when I finally talked to her when I was leaving school one day and she called me. She told me about it and I felt horrible. She was doing poorly in school, she couldn't sleep, and she was having the same thoughts I had when I was depressed... It made me sick to hear her cry. I was crying a little bit myself just hearing her story. I wanted to help her get through her depression and school work. She had helped me before with my depression. I mean, she practically saved my life. I HAD to repay her somehow, even though there isn't anything I could do to repay her for keeping me alive. I had to do something.
The next day I went to her house to help her on the senior project report. Apparently she missed so much school that she didn't turn this in on time and had to get an extension on the due date. She was short a little over a full page and I put my sentence enhancing skills to work. Needless to say, I got just enough for her to finish the report herself. But it was past 11:00 PM and I felt that it was selfish of me to just let her finish it when all I had to do was just type up the rest of what she already had. Speaking of which, if it wasn't for her other ex-boyfriend, Chris, who I just happen to be delightfully acquainted with (him = geek = yay), I wouldn't have been able to do a thing to help her. Aside from also having to put in a few quotes from her research sources, I believe that I should have done more. I was playing Flash Flash Revolution for Jebus's sake! But working over three hours on something like this had a negative effect on me. I was practically getting dizzy just sitting down in front of the computer. She still didn't get it done the next day and was given one more day to complete it due to a very good-hearted teacher who had talked to the English teacher Laura was doing the project for.
I think it was the next day that she invited me to the prom. It could've been the first day I talked to her, but I can't remember. She already had tickets that she intended to bring her back-stabbing ex along with. I wanted to ask Candra if she was going to the prom, and then later hoping to ask her to go to the prom with me, but I wasn't able to contact her before the school stopped selling tickets. I wasn't so sure on going, mainly because it would feel weird if Candra was going and she saw me with someone else. Also, I would see HER with someone else. Another thing was going through the trouble of getting a tuxedo, something of which I hadn't worn EVER. A few days later, I agreed to take her and that's when the fun began (Insert sarcasm here). Since the past week I got a tux, went dress shopping with her (My advice for guys: don't EVER go shopping with a woman for ANYTHING.), got a bouquet for her, and changed the color of the vest for my tux so that it would match her dress. I had spent a great deal of time with her and I enjoyed it a lot. We get along greatly and have such a fun time together when we hang out. But I think that's where the trouble began.
I spent a few late nights at Laura's house, just hanging out with her. One night after we finished dress shopping, we were up in her room just talking and having the leftover pizza we had at the mall. She got around to talking about her ex and she started to cry. I wanted to say something but I couldn't. She kept talking as I just sat there in silence trying to figure out what to do. Then something snuck up on me, kinda like a sniper bullet in the SOCOM game series. I was starting to develop stronger feelings for Laura. It's so wrong in so many ways. It was starting to cloud my thoughts so that I wasn't able to talk for a good while. I don't know why I was having these thoughts. She's just a really good friend of mine, nothing more. She just recently was dumped by her ex and I don't think that she is in any condition to be going out with someone else so soon. She even still has feelings for the guy that cheated on her. Most importantly, for me at least, it means that I would be kinda cheating on Candra. I proclaimed my love for her. I didn't care if she was going out with someone else, but now I don't think I can just keep going after her. If I show my feelings for Laura, it would mean that all the poetry and that Valentine's card I gave to Candra would be worthless. Tomorrow's the day before the prom, and I just don't know what to do.
